The Sub Has The Power!

[Chicagobob]

I've been struggling with this question for many years!  :

[adventurer]

I agree if you dont respect or take care of sub then the dom will soon have no sub

[Chicagobob]

Having been a fetishist for 10 years now I can safely say the Sub controls the scene. A Dom that doesn't respect the Sub's wishes and boundaries isn't a real Dom and it could lead to severe issues during the scene and after. I wrote a whole blog article on this! lol

Hey Miss Kitti!  Could you post that link?

[Chicagobob]

Here you go! http://cosplaycourtesan.com/post/166537632594/kink-friendly-courtesans-what-is-a-true
[/size]

Great read Kitti... I especially like your examples of good/bad play.  I also agree that in society it is still looked down on for a woman to be the sub.  I think people just don't understand the dynamics.  [/size]

I love Dom/sub play as long as its real..  I'm not into role play.  The actual trust it takes transcends the sex itself and it takes on an entirely different realm between the people involved.  Another misconception is the sub never gets rewarded.  To me, that's the best part - the final reward! [/size]

I always put my sub on a pedestal!  [/size]

[Crappie1]

Perfect Kitti. Explains it perfectly!

I truly believe that the intensity for me comes from balance. The balance of that power being given
from the sub, and the dom in turn, knowing and respecting when to take and when to give back that power.

That pure no BS trust that takes place in the experience is almost other worldly for me. Nothing I
have ever done can come close to the intensity of walking that line and feeling that trust.

[Chicagobob]

Perfect Kitti. Explains it perfectly!

I truly believe that the intensity for me comes from balance. The balance of that power being given
from the sub, and the dom in turn, knowing and respecting when to take and when to give back that power.

That pure no BS trust that takes place in the experience is almost other worldly for me. Nothing I
have ever done can come close to the intensity of walking that line and feeling that trust.

You're growing up Little Grasshopper - learning to embrace the edge!  ;D

[Crappie1]

You're growing up Little Grasshopper - learning to embrace the edge!  ;D

Haha, why thank you Master!!!

[SixT9er]

I readily admit I kniw very little about how this all works.


It seems to me that as long as the Dom respects the wishes of the Sub then yes the Sub has the power but if the Dom loses control then obviously they are in the power position especially if the Sub is restrained

[RoxyGold]

In the TOOOOOWWWWWNNNNN...


Where I was BOOOOORRRRRNNNN...


Oops, wrong sub! Sorry about that hehe  ;D

[rachelvarga]

Dom/subs are never in control. Control means a person is dictating instructions and with humans that tends to mean an absolute.


The BDSM culture makes all these rules think they know everything. Ironically the group that wants to be do different is just like any other group. Think they know everything. Fetlife with all these people claiming to be different but they are all the same and it's boring.


A sub and Dom are symbiotic. They need each other. The Dom's control is illusionary just like the subs.

[Chicagobob]

I wonder if all the new 50 Shades wannabe kinksters understand that true BDSM is way beyond the sex itself?  :

[Crappie1]

I wonder if all the new 50 Shades wannabe kinksters understand that true BDSM is way beyond the sex itself?  :

Doubt it

[TC]

I hate 50 shades! Spoiler alert: the protagonist is a millennial cliche, and the Dom is an emotionally stunted asshole with too much money. Somewhere in there they fuck and at the end she agrees to be caned and then flips out and cries.


The end.  ;D

[MrTShirt]

Thanks for saving me some time.  I have never read the book(s)/saw the film, in spite of the buzz.

[Chicagobob]

I got bored within the first 20 minutes.  I kept thinking that everyone now is going to believe that this is real  BDSM.  :

[rachelvarga]

I hate 50 shades! Spoiler alert: the protagonist is a millennial cliche, and the Dom is an emotionally stunted asshole with too much money. Somewhere in there they fuck and at the end she agrees to be caned and then flips out and cries.


The end.  ;D

Perfect synopsis!

[RunningSquirrel]

In the TOOOOOWWWWWNNNNN...Where I was BOOOOORRRRRNNNN... Oops, wrong sub! Sorry about that hehe  ;D

We all live in a Yellow...yeah, guess the Sub does have the power